| Hello, my name is
Charlie Horton. Welcome to my website on holistic
healing and spirituality. This may seem like a strange
combination, but I and many others have been led on a
spiritual journey because of extreme physical
difficulties. My professional training coupled with my
spiritual journey have enabled me to learn and grow. I
am now a firm believer in the value of spirituality and
the mind-body connection. They are the main reason that
I am doing as well as I am and that I am still alive. I
have realized over time that every thought, feeling and
behavior has a chemical correlate - we are biochemical
machines. Personally, I have learned over time to use this in a
self-constructive, rather than destructive way. My hope
is that what I say here will help people develop and
grow. Ultimately, if enough people discover what I
attempt to describe here, things could change
dramatically and on much more than a personal level. Unfortunately (or not!), what I attempt to
describe here is ineffable, but I will outline my
story and some of what I have learned along the way. I
wish to emphasize that I am presenting this to be of
service and that I have no interest in self-promotion or
profit of any kind. What do
I mean by spirituality? Two things:
1. That there is some unifying
power (Christ, God, Buddha, Grandfather, Higher Power,
Goddess, Source, etc.) in the universe. As far as I can
tell, the actual name makes no difference (they are all
good names), the feelings or intent behind them does
make a difference. The pure intent needs to be of love,
service, inclusiveness, empathy, humility, forgiveness,
compassion, acceptance and healing. A very powerful and
positive feeling that all those names of unifying powers
embody. The factors which cloud the intent include things like
self-interest, ego, comparison, exclusiveness, competition, fear,
judgment, guilt, shame or prestige.
2. That life follows some
purposeful course and is not merely a sequence of
random, unrelated events. Meaning, that unifying power,
in some way, guides what happens in the universe in a
very loving, forgiving, nurturing and accepting way. The
guidance can also include things like pain, suffering
and death. The pain and suffering are allowed in
order to help us grow in things like love and
forgiveness. That has certainly been so in my case. This
power guides all things (not merely humans and including
animate and supposedly inanimate things) in the universe
and transcends human words and values.
I should probably clarify some
terms in order to eliminate potential misunderstanding.
When I say love I mean a strong feeling of a desire and a
willingness to help someone else grow spiritually or
emotionally without thought about the cost to oneself. I
wish to emphasize that this includes nothing about what
a person gets in return. This concept also says nothing
about sex, which is sometimes viewed as a vital part of
love. If two people are in a loving relationship, they
spontaneously give to each other, a beautiful thing to
be part of.
The other terms that I wish to
clarify are inclusiveness and acceptance. I actually
mean all things and all people. When Christ or the
saints say that God’s kingdom is open to all, I believe
that they mean all, not just Christians. The same
applies to other disciplines.
I see all events, pleasant and
unpleasant, as having some loving purpose and I believe
that purpose is learning to give and receive love.
Incidentally, this very idea irritated me for some time
and it may do the same for you! I should also point out
that I do not state this as a person who has not
personally known pain, suffering and fear - I have felt
them all in fair measure. The reality of pain certainly
makes the loving purpose hard to see at that time, but
it is still there.
Another question is why believe in
anything at all? I have had my life saved several times
in what would be considered miraculous ways. I have
witnessed and been a part of miraculous healings. Within
the sweat lodge many things that fall outside of the
normal laws of physics occur in order to help people.
Not to mention some of the events that happen to each of
us in our daily lives that help us in just the right way
and at just the right time. I also see this sort of
thing going on in nature all around me. I can and want
to believe in a power that does these things, regardless
of what name you care to put on it. Connecting with that
power and living accordingly also helps me physically,
emotionally and spiritually. At this point, it is the
main focus of my life. A life that is very fulfilling
and wondrous beyond words as a result of that
connection. Being part of that power can change your
life in a similar manner and if everyone acted and
believed according to these ideals, it would make a
dramatic change in how we treat each other and our
planet.
Initially, 20 years ago, when I
started this process, my spiritual connection was
minimal or non-existent, depending on how broadly you
define it. I had a very troubled life up to that point.
I had quit drinking about 2 ˝ years earlier and began
working out some of my problems at that time, but I was
still hurt, angry and scared. I was also full of
attachments, fears and desires. I enjoyed (was addicted
to?) the drama. I would like to point out that in spite
of these distractions, the healing techniques I mention
in the section on holistic healing were still effective. They became more
effective over time as I worked out my problems and my
focus became more clear and uncluttered by attachments.
How a person makes their
connection with that power is up to them. Though the
process does seem to require some type of faith, giving
up a belief in things of this world and sticking with a
spiritual path/discipline of choice. As far as I can
tell, my path has no name or single earthly leader, but
my devotion and willingness are total. Many of the
ideas expressed hear can also be found in Eckhart
Tolle's A New Earth; St. Teresa of Avila's
Life of Prayer ; Thomas Dubay, S.M.'s Fire Within
and Irene Claremont de Castillejo's Knowing
Woman.
I will now summarize
what happened with me.
The process began a short time
after I initially got clean and sober. I was having some
sort of a problem which I thought very important but I
had no solution for. Someone suggested that I simply ask
for help (if they had suggested prayer or meditation I
would have been condescendingly angry and frustrated
with them). So I asked for help, did what seemed right
and things worked out! I continued asking for help and
guidance and began calling it prayer and meditation. I
think of what is right as feeling like a clear mountain
stream and what is wrong as feeling like a turbid lake.
The ideas that feel right generally include things like;
love, forgiveness, acceptance, compassion,
understanding, truthfulness, empathy, humility, true
pride, inclusiveness and service to others. The ideas
that feel wrong generally include things like;
judgments, resentments, false pride, ego,
self-centeredness, lying, exclusion and selfishness.
For several years after my initial
experience, mentioned above, the feelings and my
connection simply got stronger and gradually my faith
and trust grew. When I became disabled, during my
meditation, I would go to a place I called La-La land, a
place between being asleep and being awake. At some
point La-La land took on the characteristics of love,
forgiveness, acceptance, compassion, understanding,
truthfulness, empathy, humility, true pride and
inclusiveness (for a vivid, beautiful and passionate
description of this place, which she also calls La-La
land, please check out Dr. Jill BolteTaylor's March 2008 TED
TALK) . Ultimately, my meditation and prayer led
me to a place which is extremely intense and way beyond
words, though some do much better with the words than I
do. I also began to experience what some would call
miracles others would say being touched by God. Along
the way I have given up many attachments and attitudes
that blocked me from having the connection I desired and
learned to depend on. I now lead what many would call a
disciplined life, though I do not see it that way. I
simply want a life of joy and fulfillment and will do
what is necessary to achieve it.
At this point I spend a good deal
of time each day in communion with the force or power
that many call God and my life is oriented at following
that path. A good part of my life and that path is being
of service to others. I have adopted the characteristics
which I encountered; love, forgiveness, acceptance,
peace, being of service and inclusiveness. I go to what
I call the “God place” every day when I pray and
meditate. My service work consists largely of helping
others get closer to the God place and helping them make
that a part of daily life. At this point, my life is
incredibly fulfilling and I feel “touched by God” much
of the time, a feeling that is impossible to adequately
describe. It’s a great way to live! More
importantly, if enough others discovered the same things,
it could dramatically change what happens on this
planet.
I also try not to participate in
the things that feel wrong to me which include some
religious activities, materialism, overeating, caffeine,
nicotine and vegging out with TV . I do participate in
the activities that feel right, which has led me to the
things I mention in this web site! That is probably why
all the self care I do doesn’t feel like discipline - it
feels right and increases my spiritual connection.
Back to Top |